Once Again

I did NOT go to work again today. I am way better. No fever. Less congestion. But I just feel so weak and tired. I didn't go to the doc, either, although I said I would. I figured I was getting better and that was good enough. I really am paranoid about the overuse of antibiotics. But I'm a good bit better, so I figured I would take today to recouperate, run some errands that were imperative...that kind of thing. I woke up and felt halfway decent. I got dressed without feeling like I might pass out, so that was good. I made it to the library (books needed returning), and got completely winded walking inside. But I recovered. I ran by Target and although I was struggling by then, I was still doing OK. But the grocery store was my downfall.

I HAD to go. We were almost out of anything edible. And while my husband is fabulous, grocery shopping and cooking are NOT things on his radar. Oh, if I say specifically "we need milk"...or bread or whatever, he will do it. He doesn't mind running to the store every now and then for a few items. But when it comes to a major haul, he just doesn't do it often enough to really know what we need. So, there I was. I made it about halfway through, not really being able to concentrate. Not sure what we needed (almost everything), or what I was buying (I was just putting stuff in my cart because I could not THINK straight). But anyway, at about the halfway point I realized I was in trouble. I had a spell of weakness that made me see spots in front of my eyes. I was afraid I was going to faint in the aisle. And I was so angry and frustrated at myself for not being able to complete such a menial, normal, every day task.....I managed, barely. Somehow. But I called Stephen who ran over to unload the car. I was embarrassed by having to do that, but I didn't know how I was going to get all of those bags inside. Bruce was at work....and I was just not capable. Thank you son. I would still be out there, taking in one thing at a time, I guess, if you hadn't been able to help me. It made me feel really old and terribly decrepit. I had a small crying jag on the way home thinking how awful and unfair this all was. I know....its fine. I'm fine, and it's not the end of the world. I guess I just needed a good cry.

Anyway, after that, I called and talked to one of my supervisors at work. I explained it to her, that this was more than a cold, and although I was much better....I was far from 100%. I told her that if she was in a real bind, I could attempt coming to work tomorrow. But she said that she could make arrangements to give me another day. Which means through the weekend, and surely by then I will be back up to speed. I hope. I had NO intentions of wasting days off with something this stupid. But looking back, even though I didn't go to the Dr., I am thinking this was the flu.
It has been way more terrible than any cold I have ever had. So, I have another few days to get myself together....and hopefully I can put this week behind me.